


The Cure: Fascination Street

by fabricdragon



Series: The Cure [3]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Asexuality Spectrum, Bipolar Disorder, Bisexual Male Character, Demisexuality, Developing Relationship, Domestic, Friends to Lovers, Kink Negotiation, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Violence, Pre-Canon, Psychology, Sharing a Bed, of a sort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2020-05-28 19:22:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19400746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabricdragon/pseuds/fabricdragon
Summary: continuing in the series of "The Cure" Sebastian has just moved in as Jim Moriarty's personal bodyguard and teddy tiger.  they have a LOT of boundary issues and psychological landmines to work out.    (Discussions of sex and sexuality feature a bit more in this story arc)Alternating POV more or lessNOTE on POV: the second chapter has a recap of events in the first chapter so you get a feel for the thoughts, but usually its not going over the same events.





	1. Oh it's opening time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mickie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickie/gifts), [InnerSpectrum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InnerSpectrum/gifts), [MinMu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinMu/gifts), [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts), [just_a_tad_crazy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_a_tad_crazy/gifts), [IantoLives](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IantoLives/gifts), [FantasyTLOU](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasyTLOU/gifts), [Seramarias](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seramarias/gifts).



Sebastian had expected to be driven around to lose any traces; he had expected the security checks on switching cars; he had NOT expected to eventually end up at his old Alma Mater. Being back at the University- well near it- evoked almost equal parts nostalgia and an urgent need to get back to Afghanistan…

The explosions in Afghanistan only hurt physically, unlike the emotional explosions.

Jim came out, clean and neat and … _yeah he was that cute_ … and grabbed one of his bags. “I don't carry bags for people, normally, but i wanted you out of sight before the early morning classes. Right now you look a bit out of place.”

Sebastian dragged a hand through his hair, remembering some of his rather juvenile rebellions in college, “I could always grow a beard again- probably fit right in jogging most mornings.”

Jim suddenly started stuttering,. “Uh… well, uh… yes that would…actually that would stand out, not blend in.”.

When they got inside Sebastian looked around at a fairly neat place… most of the books in bookshelves, a handful of things he recognized from the flat, but not a lot. “So… this looks better...” 

“This is a stage set, so no, I never let it go like that.” Jim spoke quietly. “I just brought over the few things I really liked from the flat.”

“Stage set?” Sebastian put the last bag down in the living room and looked around, “Looks like… sort of like a professor lives here.” _well not really, most professors had more books and papers when I was a student…_ He shook his head away from wallowing in memories.

“Close. When i’m here I’m Jim Dougherty, accountant- does taxes and business accounting for people in and around the University, and tutors in math and physics if he likes you or you pay enough.” Jim grinned suddenly- it was wicked looking and adorable- “Less publicly I can get you the test questions in advance for a somewhat higher fee, since I make up a lot of the tests for the professors.”

Sebastian’s eyes widened, “If the rates on that are anything like what my idiot roommate paid for his English essays back when… why are you bothering with anything else?”

“Amazingly some of what i get paid in is insider trading information from the families, and of course news about who might be in the market for things, or need some exceptional favors… it's a cover identity, but a profitable one, and thus directly connected to some of what i was likely targeted for.” Jim shrugged and changed the subject. “So… ah...i didn't get all the details about your boss trying to kill you, care to fill me in?”

“Only if we get something to eat and drink first- it was a long drive for me, and you’re probably long overdue.” 

Once they were seated with some food and coffee - tea for Jim- Sebastian gave a short summary of calling in his refusal to proceed with the assassination, his contact’s statements about his future work being in question, and then waking up with an assailant in the room and how that went: “... and then I called you.”

Jim had been looking tight lipped and unhappy, but just nodded and said, “Well, my agent on site got the injector so that's something- we should have the results soon.”

“Results?” _Results of what kind of toxin it was?_

“Whether it was aiming at killing you or-”

“What ELSE could it be?”

“Well, since they are clearly idiots for not recognizing your value, Tiger, i assume they might be stupid enough to think almost anything: they could have been trying to kill you on site, or they might have wanted you brought in for interogation.”

Sebastian felt like a damn idiot for not even thinking of it. “..oh.. I uh… didn't think of that. I mean I'm pissed at that too- i would have come in if he’d asked.”

“I do hope you understand that I'm NOT thrilled with the idea of you being asked anything about me you didn't already give them.”

 _Yeah, that makes sense._ Sebastian took a deep breath, “So...what now?”

Jim shrugged, “You work for me. We already discussed the fact that, well, I'm not the best person in the world at taking care of myself, even if I'm brilliant at solving other people’s problems.”

“I did notice.”

“So.. most of your job is-” he waved a hand around the room in a vague fashion, like he didn't want to come right out and say ‘babysit a suicidal criminal mastermind’.

“Make sure you eat, sleep, and stay hydrated, and maybe open a window and look outside every once in a while?” Sebastian raised an eyebrow at him.

Jim sat back in his chair, “yeah, basically… and kill anyone who tries to kill me, and maybe a few hits on some people because even your accessible records are incredible.”

 _Well at least he admires my skills, but it's still weird._ “So… if this is like… “ Sebastian dragged his hand through his hair. “You want me to share your bed?”

“I don’t believe I'm saying this, but yes.”

Sebastian kept his eyes on the book case behind him as he asked, “Is sex involved in this? Because…”

“I… doubt it? Maybe? Um… I mean it could be but not…” Jim was stumbling over words again, and this WASN’T going to work unless they could get this all clear and… _I honestly have no idea if he’s interested or not, and i never slept with an employer before, and it sounds like a very bad idea..._

Sebastian tried to be practical. “Ok, first things first: I need a room to myself, both to have a space of my own and someplace to store my stuff, EVEN if I’m sleeping in your bed sometimes.”

Jim agreed and showed him to a perfectly nice guest room.

It was tempting to just ignore the issues, but.. _No, nothing good came of that, best to get this all spelled out from the get go_ “… and then I think we need to have a long talk about your depression and suicidal tendencies, both of our nightmares, and the fact that you really ARE that cute once you’ve cleaned up.”

Jim just froze and then muttered something about tea and went out. Sebastian sighed and started putting his things away, this is going to be a mess. After a while he had to admit he was stalling and went back out to find Jim: he finally found him pacing around with a phone clutched in one hand and two tea cups set down on a table.

“So I was stalling long enough that I couldn't lie to myself any longer…” Sebastian sat down and picked up a tea cup. “Are you pacing with a phone for a reason or is it just a nervous habit?”

“I'm not nervous!”

“Why not, I am.”

Jim paused and looked at him for a while and finally sat down in the other chair. He put the phone down and picked up the tea cup, turning it in his hand slowly. “Why are you nervous?”

“I have never lived with an employer- other than with my fellow soldiers but that's not the same. I’ve never, ever, had a relationship of any personal kind with my boss- or a target- as you know. And i’ve just run away from a government assassination, or kidnapping, to go work for … someone my old boss wanted killed.” he sipped his tea carefully, “I think any ONE of those would be a bit nerve wracking.”

“Oh.” Jim sipped his tea for a while. “Well… alright...maybe I'm a bit out of sorts myself.”

“I would much rather have things out in the open and discussed than causing anxiety… or… well look, we both have nightmares, we both sleep with knives… I think we need to settle any personal disputes before bedtime at least.”

“I don’t sleep with people,” Jim said quietly enough that Sebastian had to strain to hear him. “Not since i was a kid anyway.”

“Do you mean sex or sleeping?”

“Sleeping. I… don’t have sex all that often either anymore, but even then i never slept with them.”

“I would expect… it would be difficult to trust people, given your profession.” Sebastian nodded, “God knows mine messed up a lot- hard to have a relationship of any kind when you’re lying about everything.”

“Partly that.”

Sebastian considered just how badly he had been taking care of himself. “You… get pretty bad depression…”

“Yeah, and i get the flip side too.” Jim muttered into his tea: he didn't seem to be drinking it much, more using it as a sounding board.

“Have you TRIED meds?”

Very clipped, “yes. They are off the table.”

“Ah. Care to tell me-”

“No.” Jim interjected and then somewhat grudgingly, “Maybe when i know you better.”

 _Touchy subject, right_. “Anything I should watch out for? Triggers? PTSD?”

Jim looked up at him and very slowly his eyes widened, “Oh… I ah… yes, i mean i have some…”

“I think I need to know if I'm trying to keep you safe.”

Jim immediately retorted, “What are yours!?”

Sebastian closed his eyes and took a deep breath- _fair is fair, i was asking him…_ “I got worked over by some people- i can't tell you where or when, its classified- but i have a lot of PTSD triggers from that; suffice it to say that restraining me is probably not a good idea, and… well a lot of sounds and smells from that time can set me off. If I wake up feeling under threat the best bet is just to hold still around me- NEVER startle me awake at close range- because i react by coming out with a knife… that saved my life last night.”

Jim cleared his throat, but some of the tension was leaving his shoulders. “Uh, ditto… on both counts, although I suspect the circumstances differ.”

Sebastian offered, “I have some major issues with animals being hurt- I don't cope well.”

“Oh… i… I don't think I would care? I’m not sure.”

Sebastian filed that for future reference and went on. “I have major issues with my father, beyond major issues, and it's probably better never to mention him.”

Jim smiled slightly, “we’re quite the pair aren't we? Me too.”

Sebastian tilted his head and considered, “I get very touchy about consent issues. That's why i didn't want to have you thinking you HAD to have sex with me. If there is any chance that you might want to we need to get consent pretty clear.”

Jim fidgeted with his tea cup, “I don't… i don't mind sex, i mean it can be fun, but most people are less interesting than my hand, you know?”

Sebastian blinked several times, “I… always found the opposite myself- a partner was way more fun than just… I mean not that i always had the option…”

“People are boring… and even with pretty people I'd usually rather just look at them than… you know, have sex.”

 _Well that's definitely odd._ “Did… uh… did you have a bad experience? I mean with sex? Because that’s…”

Jim put his cup down and a muscle tensed in his jaw. “Yes i’ve had several very bad experiences with sex; no, i don't think that has anything to do with it: I’ve NEVER just looked at someone and wanted to fuck them, or have them fuck me, and… the few times i did kind of want to… well anyway even when the person wasn't that interesting, i could enjoy sex… I mean unless i was being undercover, in which case it's kind of hard to enjoy, you know?”

“Actually… yes, that I understand: I had to use a completely false identity a few times, and one time I ended up in bed with someone.. And it was… well it's a good thing I had the skills to distract her a bit because I just didn't enjoy it: I was lying about everything.”

“Her?”

Sebastian blinked and then shrugged, “I’m bisexual: i have specific things i like in men, and specific things i prefer in women, but… I'm not just interested in guys, no.”

“You are interested in me, aren't you?” Jim was chewing on his lip and was back to looking like the insecure college kid.

“It's… complicated: You are cute, and I like intelligence and competence, so yes… but…”

“But?”

“I have this feeling like I'd be taking advantage of you- it may be unreasonable, but there it is, probably because you were my target… and the whole ‘ you’re my boss’ thing is just weird.”

“Then let's discuss it another time because… well for now? When i say i want you to sleep with me i mean sleep.”

His phone chose that moment to start buzzing angrily. “Work, sorry.” he said after a glance at it.

“Business first.” Sebastian nodded and set about exploring the kitchen and thinking.

 _Two heavily armed, very messed up people with a tendency to wake up going for a knife…_ Sebastian was a bit too fond of betting games for his own good, and yeah he might take a few crazy risks every now and then, but he didn't like the odds of this one bit.

_Still… it wouldn't be boring._


	2. So let's cut the conversation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim's POV... and those unredacted files are still fairly redacted.

_ He wants to talk about my issues… _ Somehow that was far far scarier than the idea that Sebastian might just decide to kill him. Jim tried making tea… that usually calmed him down… nope. He was pacing around the room with his phone trying to talk himself into having Sebastian just shot…

It had to be better than talking about depression or suicide or…

Jim nearly jumped out of his skin when Sebastian walked out of the room and started talking. He sat down and picked up one of the tea cups. “Are you pacing with a phone for a reason or is it just a nervous habit?”

“I'm not nervous!” Jim protested immediately:  _ just because I invited a tall strong, good looking assassin to move in with me is no reason to be nervous! _

Sebastian smiled over his tea cup. “Why not, I am.”

_...You are? And you … just admit it? _ Jim sat down slowly in the other chair and fiddled with his tea cup. “Why are you nervous?”  _ why WOULD you be nervous? I mean it's not like you know anything about my combat skills... _

“I have never lived with an employer- other than with my fellow soldiers but that's not the same. I’ve never, ever, had a relationship of any personal kind with my boss- or a target- as you know. And i’ve just run away from a government assassination, or kidnapping, to go work for … someone my old boss wanted killed.” he sipped his tea, looking very relaxed and not at all ill at ease, “I think any ONE of those would be a bit nerve wracking.”

“Oh.” Jim sipped his tea for a while while he worked his nerve up-  _ if he can admit it, i can. _ . “Well… alright...maybe I'm a bit out of sorts myself.” Jim stared into his tea cup and then looked up at Sebastian when he started to speak-  _ no, he didn't look like he was sneering or anything. _

“I would much rather have things out in the open and discussed than causing anxiety… or… well look, we both have nightmares, we both sleep with knives… I think we need to settle any personal disputes before bedtime at least.”

_ Oh… yeah… that… could be an issue, couldn't it _ . He tried to say something and finally managed. “I don’t sleep with people; not since i was a kid anyway.”

“Do you mean sex or sleeping?” 

He didn't sound angry, Jim glanced at him- he wasn't; just trying to understand. “Sleeping. I… don’t have sex all that often either anymore, but even then i never slept with them.” Jim waited for the response, but it wasn't anything he expected.

“I would expect… it would be difficult to trust people, given your profession.” Sebastian just nodded understandingly, “God knows mine messed up a lot- hard to have a relationship of any kind when you’re lying about everything.”

Jim started breathing a bit more easily. “Partly that.”

Sebastian hesitated and then looked around the room again.. “You… get pretty bad depression…”

“Yeah, and i get the flip side too.” Jim muttered into his tea.

Sebstian of course went straight to asking about medication. Jim tried to keep his temper in check and told him it was off the table. Sebastian started to ask for details and Jim cut that off fast, although he allowed that he might explain it after… "after i know you better.”

And then he was asking about PTSD and triggers, and reminding him that they both liked to sleep with knives…Jim could picture it,  _ oh hell _ ..., “Oh… I ah… yes, i mean i have some…”

“I think I need to know if I'm trying to keep you safe.” Sebastian said very reasonably.

_ I don’t want to talk about it! _ “What are yours!?”

Sebastian closed his eyes and took a deep breath… and Jim almost fell off his chair because the man just started telling him!  _ He… he’d been captured or something? That was NOT in the public file- DAMN IT i need his unredacted file!  _ He finished up with “If I wake up feeling under threat the best bet is just to hold still around me- NEVER startle me awake at close range- because i react by coming out with a knife… that saved my life last night.”

Jim still didn't want to talk about it, but.... “Uh, ditto… on both counts, although I suspect the circumstances differ.” 

Sebastian nodded-  _ he didn't just blow me off with ‘you weren't in combat’?! _ , “I have some major issues with animals being hurt- I don't cope well.”

_ Why would that  _ … Jim puzzled over that one, but made a note in case it came up. 

Sebastian added, as if it was nothing unusual. “I have major issues with my father- beyond major issues- and it's probably better never to mention him.”

“We’re quite the pair aren't we? Me too.” Jim actually felt… it was an odd sort of relieved… _ he wasn't upset, or sneering or… acting like I was weak... _

Unfortunately he went back to talking about sex., “I didn't want to have you thinking you HAD to have sex with me. If there is any chance that you might want to we need to get consent pretty clear.”

Jim fidgeted with his tea cup,  _ how the hell do you explain something like this? _ , “I don't… i don't mind sex, i mean it can be fun, but most people are less interesting than my hand, you know?”

Sebastian sounded confused, but he didn't sound upset, “I… always found the opposite myself- a partner was way more fun than just… I mean not that i always had the option…”

Jim muttered, “People are boring… and even with pretty people I'd usually rather just look at them than… you know, have sex.”

“Did… uh… did you have a bad experience? I mean with sex? Because that’s…”

Jim put his cup down before he threw it. “Yes i’ve had several very bad experiences with sex; no, i don't think that has anything to do with it: I’ve NEVER just looked at someone and wanted to fuck them, or have them fuck me, and… the few times i did kind of want to… well anyway even when the person wasn't that interesting, i could enjoy sex… I mean unless i was being undercover, in which case it's kind of hard to enjoy, you know?”  _ Telling me I should go to a doctor and get that ‘cured’ in 3… 2… 1... _

“Actually… yes, that I understand: I had to use a completely false identity a few times, and one time I ended up in bed with someone.. And it was… well it's a good thing I had the skills to distract her a bit because I just didn't enjoy it: I was lying about everything.”

Jim was so busy being in shock that Sebastian had just accepted that, that he almost missed the pronoun. “Her?”

“I’m bisexual: i have specific things i like in men, and specific things i prefer in women, but… I'm not just interested in guys, no.”

“You are interested in me, aren't you?” Jim asked and then started yelling at himself for not leaving well enough alone.

“It's… complicated: You are cute, and I like intelligence and competence, so yes… but…”

_ I should shut up, I should not ask, I really shouldn't.. _ .“But?”

“I have this feeling like I'd be taking advantage of you- it may be unreasonable, but there it is, probably because you were my target… and the whole ‘ you’re my boss’ thing is just weird.”

Jim started by getting his back up about the whole ‘taking advantage’ thing, and tried to stop himself from being upset... _ he’s being remarkably reasonable, and I need to encourage that, not try to seduce him to prove a damn point! _ “Then let's discuss it another time because… well for now? When i say i want you to sleep with me I mean sleep.”

His phone chose that moment to start buzzing angrily: Jim glanced down…  _ ah? Those un-redacted files… oh hell yes i need a look at those..  _ “Work, sorry.”

“Business first.” Sebastian nodded.

Jim walked into the office and started looking the files over.

A great deal of the file was simply elaboration on the UNredacted files- more about his grades, more about his scores in his early military career- but once you got into his actual service records it got interesting. Sebastian clearly had issues with authority most of the time, and those issues appeared to vanish under certain commanders, so… he COULD follow orders and chain of command well, just sometimes… he didn't.

And his combat skills, infiltration skills and ohmyGod his sniper skills were off the charts: they’d obviously kept him in service despite some very nasty reviews by a few commanding officers because…

Jim nearly drooled over a few of the classified kill records.

So he really did have some insubordination issues, and a gambling habit- he’d gotten in a lot of trouble over that one- and…  _ had he ACTUALLY decked his commanding officer?! _ Jim checked: he had. He had decked his commander over… hmmm… some mission that got one of his men killed? And as punishment he was offered a discharge or a suicide mission…? He took the suicide mission?!

And he not only survived, he succeeded…

And then he resigned… and reading between the lines he’d beaten that self-same officer soundly again, only this time he wasn't brought up on charges… hmmm…   
Oh i have to ask about this one…. But it might be when he got captured and worked over? Wait… there was nothing in these files about that…?   
Jim dug, hard, and sent a firm request for more data to his agent in records… these files LOOKED un-redacted, but they were missing some things… very skillfully concealed…

“You didn't eat lunch, are you planning on eating dinner?”

“Hmm?” Jim looked up blinking from his computer… Sebastian was leaning in the doorway with his arms crossed looking utterly deadly and delicious.

“Oh… is it… late?” Jim glanced at the clock- yes very- “sorry, i was working on a few projects.”

“Part of my job is to keep you hydrated and fed. I made the mistake of thinking that putting a sandwich and drink next to you would help…” He pointed to an untouched sandwich and drink. 

“oh… I hadn't noticed.”

“Right.” Sebastian stood up away from the doorway, “Shut that down, at least for now, and come out to the table and eat.”

“But i’m working!”

“Or I can pick you up and drag you.”

“... you wouldn't…”

“You are literally paying me to.” Sebastian’s raised eyebrow said, ‘just try me’ and Jim considered his insubordination records…

“Right, yes… I suppose I am.” he closed the laptop and came out to find the table set and dinner waiting.

“This… looks nice actually.”

“You need to get away from work every now and then.” Sebastian nodded firmly and sat down across from him.

He utterly refused to discuss business, at all.

“Nope, you clearly need defined boundaries on your work: its dinner time, not work time. If it isn't an ACTUAL emergency, you can walk away from work for long enough to eat.”

Jim grumbled, but unfortunately the bastard had a point.

After he ate the ( pretty decent) dinner Jim decided to get straight down to it. “So… I got the supposedly unredacted files on you, except there’s still stuff missing.”

“Probably.”

“You said you got worked over, but there’s no record…”

“there shouldn't be, and its classified.” 

“I don't like not getting the full files.” 

“Life is tough. You ready for dessert yet?”

“... I see where the insubordination gets to be an issue.”

“I did warn you.” Sebastian smiled, “but it's also probably why I didn't just do my job and kill you, so…”

Jim couldn't help but smile briefly, “True, point taken. One of the things I was looking into was spending a bit of time out of the country- follow up in person on some other business, and let the heat die down here…”

“Fair enough.” Sebastian nodded. “When do you want to leave, and… when do you think you’ll get the report back on that injector? I’d really like to know what they were planning.”

“The report? Probably tomorrow: leave? It will take me at least a few days to wrap things up neatly or prepare to work remotely- if i don't have to bolt i won't lose much money.”

Sebastian cleaned up in the kitchen, Jim finished up work, and they both unwound a bit in the living room- apparently both of them found weapon maintenance soothing.

Jim found himself surprisingly comfortable with Sebastian, even when he was clearly armed… of course it helped that they could compare opinions on honing stones, and Sebastian had some very good suggestions on concealed carry holsters, as well as better gun oil and cleaners.

It was cozy.

_ I could get used to this. _


	3. and get out for a bit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two men with PTSD and knives, what could go wrong?

Sebastian tried to act as though going to bed with this…. Enigma… was normal. Jim seemed rather ill at ease too, but then neither of them were used to sleeping with people, apparently, and… well…

“Err… Goodnight Tiger.” Jim muttered and sort of huddled up on the far side of the bed.

Sebastian started going over projects and plans in his mind- _i really want to know what the hell Antarctica was thinking._ He dropped off to sleep shortly after drawing up a shopping list for new weapons: he wasn't really outfitted for a bodyguard job.

Sebastian woke up fast when he heard a soft whimpering noise… _oh… Jim_. Jim was curled around his pillow trying to muffle the sounds… Sebastian moved to wrap an arm around him as he had the first time…

In the next moment he was fighting for his life against a panicked man with a knife in the same bed.

Once he had disarmed Jim- and was trying to get him calmed down while figuring out just how BADLY he had been stabbed- he made a note to himself that sheets and blankets tangled terribly when you were in bed with a knife fight.

“Shhh… its just me… Sebastian… its ok… can I let go of you yet?”

“T-Teddy?... Tiger?....” Jim was breathing very hard, gasping and shaking badly. 

“Yup. if you’re a bit calmer and won’t go for the knife again- I need to find out how badly I'm bleeding.”

“Bleeding?”

“Since I felt myself get cut, and it feels like blood, I assume that I am bleeding: I have no idea if you are. I threw your knife into the corner, and I'd like to get the lights on…”

It took a few moments more to untangle the sheets and get to the light…. It looked like a particularly sloppy murder scene. 

“White sheets and blood are always so pretty…” muttered JIm.

“Pretty?!” Sebastian was reassured by the limited blood on the bed, and identified a grazing slice on his own chest that was still bleeding sluggishly: he would have to get Jim unwrapped and maybe washed off to check for injuries because he was bloodied from being help tightly against Sebastian.

“It’s pretty… it would be prettier on the wall.” Jim continued, “better splash pattern… or the floor… the sheets end up just sort of smooshed eventually…”

“Oooo-kay… come on, let's get into the bathroom and clean up; I can't tell if you’re cut.”

Jim shivered in the shower, even under the hot water, but at least he didn't seem to be injured. 

“I think this just needs some butterfly strips, not stitches…” 

“Are… you aren’t angry?” Jim’s voice was shaking.

Sebastian looked back at the man, soaking wet in the shower, shivering. “No…” _oh hell he’s scared of me?_ “No, Jim, I'm not HAPPY about it, but I’m not angry at you.”

Jim mumbled something unintelligible.

“What?”

“I could… give you a blow job or something…”

Sebastian’s first reaction was to be angry, followed shortly after by being sad that Jim would even think that. “I thought we agreed that sex was something we needed to talk about… and i think now is not a good time to talk about it.”

He looked perplexed- which was at least a step up from being scared. “You… don’t want a blow job?”

Sebastian sighed, “I need bandages. Can we deal with bandaging me up first and THEN talk about this?”

“You’re really strange.” Jim muttered and walked out.

“I’m strange? I’M strange?!” Sebastian dried off and kept a bit of pressure on the cut with a washcloth. It was a clean cut at least and not that deep. Jim came back in with a first aid kit- no, more like a field medical kit- and started matter of factly patching him up.

“You’re… good at this…”

Had to patch myself up enough,” Jim admitted, “Back when I wasn't mostly working through the computer, and I’ve patched a few other folks.” he expertly applied the closures, “My aim has gone off, you should be so dead.”

“You were aiming just fine, a combination of us both being tangled in the blankets and my grabbing your wrist.”

“Well, i have to admit i never practiced close combat with both parties actually in bed under the covers.”

“And i would prefer you didn't. I assume you will eventually get used to me and i won't set off the defense reaction.” Sebastian sighed, “Its… look is there any point in going back to bed now? Or should we just get breakfast.”

“I have to strip the bed, uh...i guess breakfast… and maybe just… take a midday nap?”

Sebastian looked at the worried look on Jim and tried to smile reassuringly, “I’m fine, you go handle getting the sheets and all settled and I'll make some breakfast.”

_… I really need to order in more groceries…_

~

Jim was once again reminded of just how much of a mess a little blood could make. The sheets were a disaster and it was just lucky he had a barrier layer on the mattress or he would have been having to replace that too. This is why he normally just had a minion or a clean up crew handle this stuff…

But he didn't normally have to clean up his own bedroom.

 _I still can’t believe he isn't mad about it…_ Jim came back out a bit carefully, not quite certain if Sebastian was the kind who looked ok and then blew up at you later or not… no, he had made breakfast.

“We need to put in better supplies, if we’re staying.” Sebastian said as he put a plate of food down for jim.

Jim watched him moving around the kitchen- he walked like a tiger, smoothly and quietly and with a sense of controlled power. “We.. won't stay long, but yes we should put in some supplies for the next few days… “

“I hope the food is acceptable?” Sebastian sat down with his own plate of food.

“Oh… ah…” Jim put a forkful into his mouth… _Mmmm…_

“I’ll take happy noises and eyes shutting as ‘that's great, thanks’.” Sebastian laughed and started eating.

“It’s very good, and… I actually have an appetite… and I'm sorry i stabbed you.”

“Thank you, and… well, we knew two people with PTSD and weapons was going to take work: luckily no serious harm done.”

Once Jim finished breakfast he tried to figure things out again. “You… ah… didn’t take me up on the blow job…”

“I am… look, like i said in your other flat: i refuse to have you thinking you have to have sex to be safe from me. I’d feel terribly guilty about it, if nothing else.” Then the man flashed that crooked grin that made Jim… feel things. “Besides, if we ever do get together that way i want both of us to enjoy it.”

“I… ah… can… you are a lot more interesting than most folks- I bet you would be more fun… ah… I’m… I don't know what it would be like with you, but the other folks i had sex with trying to have fun usually complained because i bite… or … stuff..”

Tiger immediately pointed to his crotch, “no biting there without a LOT of discussion ahead of time.”

Jim laughed, “well, no, I LIKE you…”

“Biting elsewhere is usually OK.” Tiger just shrugged. “But try not to draw blood or really break the skin because human mouths are filthy.”

 _I cannot believe I got this lucky!_ “Yeah… they are…” Jim felt himself blushing and more or less ran to his office.

~

Sebastian went to the grocery and got in supplies, wandered to the local shop and got some university gear and more civilian clothes to blend in to the area… if he grew in a neat beard he might pass for an adjunct professor or a graduate student…

He was just finishing up lunch prep when Jim came out of his office- voluntarily.

“I was about to come get you to make you eat!” Sebastian called out, “You said you like India, and you didn't say you DON’T like the food, so I made a few things…”

“Is that home made naan?!” Jim’s eyes went wide.

“Close: its Roti…” Sebastian threw one of the rotis on the burner and watched it start to puff.

“You… isn’t there a griddle or something?!”

Sebastian grabbed the edge and flipped it. “You start it on the cast iron- i had to buy a flat pan, luckily the local place is Pakistani- but then you finish it directly on the fire.” he pulled it off and put it on Jim’s plate. “There you go: just like i learned in India- can’t beat an Indian auntie for making Roti.”

Sebastian had been a bit concerned that Jim… well he might have said he liked India just trying to find something in common… or that he liked India but not the food… but despite not knowing his Naan from his Roti, he set to into the food happily and seemed quite content to scrape every last bit off of his plate. He also didn't try to talk business over the food this time.

“I made it mild - didn't know how much spice you liked.”

“If I'd known you could COOK i wouldn't have let you leave in the first place.” Jim mumbled as he chased the last bits of liquid around the plate with his bread.

Sebastian chuckled, “well… I can cook the food i like… mostly because I watched Auntie cook it- she was a bit shocked that a boy wanted to know how, but…” Sebastian sighed, “My father hated it, of course- but he didn't find out until later.”

Jim hesitated, “Cooking is for girls?”

“Cooking is for girls,” Sebastian agreed, “and Indian cooking is for servants.” he shrugged, “If it was European cooking he could console himself with the idea that I might be cooking dinner for a date or something? I dunno.”

“I...can cook a little: never learned how to make anything, you know, nice.”

Sebastian couldn't help but reminisce a bit, “I learned some traditional Afghani dishes- not many but enough to get by…”

“I uh...got the lab report? On the injector...it was a knock out, so… either they were planning to kill you the way they killed me- well my double- or -”

Sebastian was listening and considering what the contents being non-lethal meant when...“Woah! What? Killed you? Your double? What?”

“Um...i ah, may have fibbed to you just a bit… I mean in case you were being eavesdropped on? I was out of that flat in under four hours.”

“Oh? Well… i mean good…” Sebastian blinked, “intercepted… or i told them…” he sighed, “Yeah, sensible. So you were out while i still thought you were there?”

Jim nodded. “Anyway, i let a traitor move in- i mean he wanted to move up and was stabbing me in the back to do it,” Jim shrugged, “so i moved him in and… he got killed- or well he was lying unmoving and looked pretty dead? Anyway the assassin turned on a few things- trying to make it look like an accident, but i had the place rigged so it went up pretty spectacularly.”

“Won't that look a TINY bit suspicious, what with my apartment being bombed?”

“Maybe? But the assassin DID try to set off a gas leak or carbon monoxide or something so having the gas main go up couldn't be too weird…”

“Antarctica is way too smart to fall for that.” Sebastian sighed and dragged a hand through his hair.

“Who?”

“My… boss, contract contact, whatever... Code named Antarctica: I have no idea who he is, but he’s VERY smart, insanely precise, and… well…”

“It could have been a kidnapping?” Jim sounded dubious, “but given that my guy was left ‘dead on the floor with a cover up… you might have been meant to be verifiably dead of smoke inhalation, or drowned in a tub or something.”

“I need to try to find out- I’m kinda pissed either way, but… “

“ You… won't back out of working for me?”

“No.” Sebastian walked over and put an arm around him. “You hired a teddy bear, you got one… besides, you know my ethics- even if i ever went back to working for them I wouldn't sell you out.”

Jim closed his eyes in a pained fashion “You’d be the first.”

“...” Sebastian didn't quite know what to do with that so he pulled out his phone, “I doubt i should call in from here.”

“You can’t; I have a scrambler: otherwise they could track your cell phone.”

“They could… what?”

“If they ever got their hands on the identity code of your phone…" Jim stared at him, "didn't you know that?”

“No…?”

Jim rolled his eyes, “Right: Military intelligence is an oxymoron. Yes anyone who got at your phone can track it- especially in the country. Put it in a blocking bag, go far away and call… or call in from a burner phone.”

“I… uh already left the flat to go grocery shopping…”

Jim swore vehemently in a language that sounded familiar, but he didn't know it. “Right: my own fault for assuming… well let’s hope they never bothered to get the codes on your phone because they didn't think they would NEED them.”

Jim got him a burner phone and he went off to the university proper to call: Antarctica didn't answer. He left a brief message expressing his upset at being attacked and insisting on an explanation, and went back.

When he GOT back Jim was dressed differently- looked quite a bit like a college kid or one of those really young assistants or something.

“You said you wanted me to get out for a bit, Tiger?”

“I think it would do you some good, yes…?”

“I have to meet a contact at a club- he thinks I'm a minion, of course- and i need a big scary bodyguard… and I’d love a dance partner. Can you dance?”


	4. And let's move to the beat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a short interlude of dancing and murder

_ Oh HELL yes Sebastian could dance! _

Jim prided himself on being good at anything he tried, and he’d always loved dancing so he was even better at that than most things. He’d mostly hoped Sebastian could keep up and… not step on his toes or anything; instead Jim found himself becoming increasingly fascinated with watching the man move.

Unfortunately a lot of other people were watching him move too- especially that bitch over there: she was practically drooling.  _ Ok, you have taste, but he’s MINE! _

Luckily his contact showed up before he had to knife the girl.

Jim was going through the usual routine- just a minion, just carrying messages back and forth- while making the moves he needed to put all the little pieces in play down the line…

Unfortunately THIS guy was an ambitious idiot.

~

Sebastian had expected the man to be a decent dancer: he was extraordinary. There are technically proficient dancers- the ones who execute every move perfectly- who somehow fall flat because, honestly, their moves look mechanical, and then there are the people who use their body like a musical instrument- conveying emotion, translating the moves into art…

Jim was playing the dance floor like it was his own personal orchestra and he was the violin solo.

Sebastian was a very good dancer, but usually he was technically proficient and a bit bored: a little competition always brought out Sebastian's best.

They weren’t at the club together, of course; not as far as anyone else was concerned, so Jim danced with him every now and then and mostly danced by himself until his contact showed up.

Once the man showed up Sebastian danced enough to keep up the pretense, but otherwise lounged against the bar and chatted up various pretty things…

He didn’t trust the man as far as he could throw him.

Jim’s contact had the kind of ‘we’re all friends here’ vibe that set Sebastian’s teeth on edge. 

He also kept looking unhappy at Jim whenever Jim got up to dance or...flirted?

But he just slipped something in Jim’s drink?

Before Sebastian could warn Jim about it, Jim got up excitedly when a new song started… and came over to dance with Sebastian.

~

“Sebastian?’ Jim smiled cheerfully up at Sebastian- currently playing the ‘totally uninvolved cute guy I went to dance with’.

“Yes?” 

“The guy I've been talking to? I need him dead... “

Sebastian leaned in close and said the hottest thing Jim had ever had whispered in his ear on a dance floor, “Want me to make it look like an accident? Or do you need me to send a message?”

“Oooh… can you make it look like an accident? And… Can I watch?”

“Try to get him to drink a bit more: I’ll go set things up.” he spun Jim out and back and slid his hands down Jim’s body in a way that probably LOOKED innocent, but wasn’t. “Incidentally he drugged your drink.”

“You saw that?” Jim was delighted- it had been a fairly subtle move, and Sebastian caught it!

“Yeah, he looked like trouble when he walked in.”

“Most of my clients do, but this one went over the line a few times….”

The song ended and Jim wandered back and resumed talking to the man… and got a new drink of course- straight vodka this time, “So tired of that one” Jim laughed as he ordered the new drink, “I have no idea why I ordered it again.”

He flirted a bit more-which made the homophobic git uncomfortable- and every time the idiot looked away he poured some of his vodka into the idiot’s drink: the advantage of really top shelf vodka is it was virtually tasteless.

_ I wonder what would have happened if I’d put whatever drug he tried to spike my drink with into his drink? Nah, someone would test for it... _

Eventually Sebastian texted him with a location...and Jim talked the man into going out on one of the balconies to get some fresh air while he went to the men’s room… “meet you there! I think I had a bit much to drink, the fresh air would do me good.”

The idiot agreed and Jim wandered off towards the men’s room… and then circled around and slipped out the alley door- the unofficial smokers area- JUST in time to watch the man ‘fall’ over the railing.

Even WATCHING it happen Jim couldn't see Sebastian-not from here- it looked like the man walked out onto the balcony and just stumbled and fell… and thanks to the smokers and cell phone users?There were a few screaming witnesses!

Jim watched clueless club goers panic, several calling emergency services, one taking pictures, and one shrieking into her phone that she just saw ‘some guy fell off the roof’...

He slipped back in and found Sebastian already leaning up against the bar with two drinks in hand…

“YOU are magnificent,” Jim smiled up at him and took the second drink.

“I’m good at my job,” Sebastian smiled down at him. “Do we want to be here?”

“Nah…” Jim chuckled, “I really thought I’d be more upset at losing that contact, but… he had to go… and now so do we: i don’t want to talk to any police.”

Sebastian put his arm over Jim’s shoulder and leaned in to speak into his ear, “Then let’s just go: lots of folks saw us dancing together…”

“Yeah and this way i won't be tempted to knife that bitch,” Jim said happily and then winced.

Sebastian was steering them out and didn't say anything until they got to the car.

“Ok,” he said once they were moving, “I must have missed something: what bitch?”

“There was some bitch drooling at your ass on the dance floor,” Jim muttered.

Sebastian perked up, “Really?”

“You don’t have to look that happy about it.”

“Of course I’m happy about it,” Sebastian laughed, “I figured everyone was drooling over YOU.”

Jim opened his mouth and closed it and looked at Sebastian…

_ He was serious? _

Jim smiled and settled back in the car seat for the ride back.

**Author's Note:**

> Important Note: Sebastian and Jim are trying to discuss their PTSD and trauma issues and their sexuality, relationships, etc... what they say is not "absolute word of God this is true" its two people trying to work things out.


End file.
